Christmas in January.

At lunch today, I probably laughed harder than I have in a really long time. Megen, a co-worker of mine, LOVES to quote movies, in particular, "Christmas Vacation." Whenever we are walking on the marble floors of the hotel she channels Clark Griswold in his office when his boss is walking by and says,
"Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas, Merry Chris..kiss my ass. Kiss his ass. Kiss your ass. Happy Hanukkah."
Every time she says this, I lose it! Well at lunch today we were quoting this movie and here were a few that we lost it with...

Clark: Can I refill your eggnog for ya? Get ya something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere..leave you for dead?
Cousin Eddie: Naw, I'm doing just fine, Clark.

Ellen: Clark.
Clark: Yes, honey?
Ellen: Audrey's frozen from the waist down.
Clark: Ehh, that's all part of the experience honey.

Eddie: You surprised to see us, Clark?
Clark: Oh, Eddie... If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn't be more surprised than I am now.

Eddie: If you scratch his belly Clark, he will love you till the day you die.
Clark: I really shouldn't, Eddie, my hands are all chapped.

Eddie: Every time Catherine would turn on the microwave, I'd piss my pants and forget who I was for about half an hour.

Clark: [a squirrel is loose in the house] Where is Eddie? He usually eats these goddam things.
Catherine: Not recently, Clark, he read that squirrels were high in cholesterol.

Clark: Hey, Kids, I heard on the news that an airline pilot spotted Santa's sleigh on it's way in from New York City.
Eddie: [after a pause] You serious, Clark?

Clark: So, when did you get the tenament on wheels?
Eddie: Oh, that uh, that there's an RV. Yeah, yeah, I borrowed it off a buddy of mine. He took my house, I took the RV. It's a good looking vehicle, ain't it?
Clark: Yeah, it looks so nice parked in the driveway.
Eddie: Yeah, it sure does. But, don't you go falling in love with it now, because, we're taking it with us when we leave here next month.

And one of my favorites that I hope to memorize and quote on command one day...

Clark: Hey. If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is. Hallelujah. Holy shit. Where's the Tylenol?

Happy Thursday, where's the tylenol?